Notice the pattern
When concern becomes constant, families may repeatedly take over tasks, avoid difficult conversations or put their own needs aside. Start with specific situations: what happened, how you responded and what you could choose differently. The purpose is understanding your part, rather than labelling another person.
Make a boundary practical
A boundary describes what you will do and what you can offer. It is more useful when it is clear, realistic and within your control. Consider what support you can sustain, how you will communicate it and how you will respond consistently.
Connect your role to your actions
The Angel considers their own boundaries and wellbeing as well as the family’s progress. Supporting Members encourage the Angel and keep their own commitments. The Leader owns their goals and actions when they choose to participate. Tod helps you translate these roles into practical expectations and review them together.
When Helping Becomes Doing Everything — by Tod Cunningham ↗
When Someone You Love Is Struggling: Boundaries, Responsibility and Meaningful Consequences ↗